“The root of all suffering is attachment” -Buddha
We all want to be free and therefore feel free, but is it really like that? Most people believe to be free when in fact they delude themselves.
Freedom is more than anything a state of mind. It all comes down to your intentions, your desires and the level of attachment to particular situations that you live.
The attachment is a form of resistance to life that does not allow us to be free and at the same time, prevents us to follow our deepest self.
The attachment usually can be originated from a need for acceptance, which generates the fear of not being accepted as we are and at the same time of being unloved.
In this way, we believe that by attaching ourselves to a person or a thing this need will disappear. In fact, we are only deceiving ourselves, because at the root of all this desire it is not our heart, but just a purely egoistic need.
Here are 5 attachments you need to let go to experience the real freedom in your life:
Your father wants you to have a good education. Your mother instead wants to see you married with a good boy/girl. The educational institution wants to make you become a slave to the system.
The media want you to believe everything that they offer you, promising a life that most likely you will never have.
All these external influences keep you trapped in a state of mind that plagues you with the constant need to impress someone, or to live up to expectations that have nothing to do with what you really want to do.
Perhaps you would like to leave school and start your own business. Perhaps you like being single, or you do not need material things as we have always been led to believe.
The world around you is constantly trying to turn you into someone you’re not, imposing you expectations about your life.
This creates a mental program that keeps you constantly under pressure to meet those expectations, you’re spending your energy trying to make a mark in the consciousness of someone else to get his approval. To be free means to live for yourself.
2) Your Past
Your past does not define who you are. Contrary to what people around you might say, you’re not defined by your sins, successes, errors, or failures.
Everything you’ve done in your past, either positive or negative, will prevent you from evolving as long as you will live and be connected to it.
If you become attached to these experiences you could reach out to a state of depression or apathy for something that no longer exists.
Even if you’re attached to a positive experience, there is a risk that holding on to it does not make you live and taste the experiences of the present time.
Your past is intended to act as a guide and compass to be at your service, but you’ve been told all along that we are the sum of our history.
This translates to: “What have I done or accomplished in my recent past?”. Who holds tied to the past, only does it to have a sense of identity and value in the world. Whatever you have done or not done in your past it does not matter and does not define who you are. The only thing that matters is what you choose to do at this time to move forward.
3) The need to impress others
The need to impress others ultimately comes from our ego and is the result of millions of years of ‘evolution’. All this has created a competitive spirit within us that keeps us, slaves, with the constant need to outshine the other members of our species.
The fastest spices, the strongest and most adaptable is the one that will last and will be reproduced in the next generation. This is the ego’s purpose that served us in our past.
This is not necessary for a modern society of rational human beings, but the sense of having to compete with each other in the final analysis derives from an archaic part of our brain that is still wired through millions of years of conditioning.
This results in competition for a simple “like” on Facebook, for our bank account, or physical form. There is the need to be recognized, continually confronting and trying to impress others.
Taming the ego is the key to being free without having the desired amount required to overshadow other people. Live for yourself and be true to what you want in life. Many people do jobs they hate and they buy things they can not afford just to appear. All this is identified with our ego.
4) The fear of the future
Fear of the future is derived from shifting our attention in a hypothetical moment rather than in the present moment.
Since our focus is consumed in that hypothetical moment, emotions begin to generate anxiety and fear within our field of energy.
There is nothing scary in the future. The future is scary only if we anticipate a failure or a pain. This does nothing but anticipates our fears to materialize themselves.
The way to overcome the fear of the future is divided into two paths: first, we need to keep our mind and attention focused on what is happening in the present moment. Second, we must overcome any feeling of disbelief hidden in ourselves.
In the future, there is nothing to fear. It ‘just another present moment just like this. If we can learn to take advantage of the present moment and make it as clear as possible, our future will be a result.
5) The unnecessary relationships
The relationships are available in many categories: Spouse / Partner, friends, family and business associates.
Sometimes, we get stuck in relationships simply because we want to do no harm to another person. In other words, we maintain relationships and friendships with individuals that play with our feelings of guilt.
If we live in a relationship that only causes guilt, we are adapting to an unhealthy situation of fear.
So for example, many people find themselves in unhappy marriages for fear, forgetting that life is too short to do anything but follow their heart.
Let go of fear and give yourself permission to follow your heart. Freedom means being free to express yourself, say what you want to say and hear what you hear, even if it means sometimes making someone else unhappy.
Are you following your heart? Are you living for yourself or for people who are close to you? Are you true to what you feel at any time?
“Death is a natural part of life.
Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force.
Mourn them do not. Miss them do not. Attachment leads to jealousy.
The shadow of greed, that is.”
You will not be free in life until you let go each of your attachments.