Infidelity is something that no likes to talk about. But it happens more than you think.
It’s sad, but it’s pretty likely that at some point in your life you’ll have a partner who cheats on you. And when that happens, you’ll be forced to make tough choices, so remember to consider the following.
You’ve just found out that your partner is cheating on you.
So before you do anything, wait! Your immediate reaction is going to be emotional. And when you’re emotional, you won’t make the best decisions.
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So cry, yell, or break things, but don’t take any action until the storm has passed.
Decide if you’ll stay or go.
Once you have solid proof of infidelity, the first decision you’ll have to make is whether or not you’re going to stay in the relationship. How long have you been dating?
Are you in love? Can you picture your life without your partner? Do you think you can forgive your partner? The last one is the most important — and it will take you time to figure out the answer.
Take a beat and tell your partner that you need time away to think things over. Agree that you shouldn’t be in contact until you’ve figured out what you want.
If you’ve decided that your relationship is worth saving then you may have a tough road ahead of you. Cheating can be a symptom of other problems in your relationship.
So if you and your partner have decided to try to save it, you’ll have to identify what’s going wrong in your relationship before you can fix it.
It might be a good idea for you and your partner to try therapy, either together with a relationship counselor or solo.
This applies to you whether you decide to stay in your relationship or not. Learning you’ve been cheated on is the emotional equivalent to being punched in the gut repeatedly.
You’ll feel the lowest you’ve ever felt — so now is the best time for you to take a trip or even go to the spa. Just try to pick something you know you’ll enjoy doing.
And for good measure, bring some close friends along. They’ll distract you when you need distracting and be there when you need a shoulder to cry on.
This one only applies if you decided to break things off. You have every right to feel miserable about this.
Do whatever you need to do. If that means you’re sitting at home in your sweats watching Twin Peaks every day, do it.
No one ever said moving on was a pretty process.
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This was not your fault.
Since hindsight is always 20/20, you might be tempted to think, what could I have done to prevent this?
And the answer is: nothing. Torturing yourself with what-ifs is futile. What’s done is done and now you need to focus on moving on.
There’s no quick fix for being cheated on. Unfortunately, the only way to overcome it is to just keep on living.
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